More things I didn't buy: Special early Mother's Day edition

No, I certainly did not buy this copy of Sometimes My Mom Drinks Too Much. Cut too close to the bone.

If this Mommie Dearest movie poster had been in halfway decent shape, I totally would have bought it (though if it had been in halfway decent shape, it wouldn't have been $4. This is the same estate sale where a Jack Daniel's Christmas tree was priced at hundreds of dollars. Then again, I'm not familiar with the market for JD Christmas trees so maybe that was totally reasonable). This would've been perfect wall art for the home office, though it may have frightened the children and haunted their dreams, just like the vinage Medea poster my mother hung in our upstairs hallway haunted mine. A poster featured a wild-eyed Medea holding a bloody dagger, her slain children at her feet. Hm. Mom, what were you thinking? Anyway, I was always a huge fan of Mommie Dearest as was my friend Rob, with whom I used to recite the dialogue ("Don't fuck with ME, fellas!"). In one of those fleeting but intense moments of estate sale frisson, I found this poster on his birthday. Naturally frenzied texting ensued.

Maybe this is a slight stretch for my Mother's Day theme, but an Oster Vibra-Massager does say "I love you, Mom!" better than flowers or a coffee mug, doesn't it? However, I could not bring myself to buy it. Along with my strict no-undergaments estate sale policy, I have an equally inflexible attitude toward buying secondhand vibrators, no matter how cute the original packaging.